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Thursday, November 28, 2013

Dating Prison – Mr. Youngster #4

Name: Mr. Youngster
Age: 25
Likes: Women like his mother
Dislikes: Height jokes
Victim Eligible: Pending review - Maturity 
Charge: Stalker Qualities
Sentence:  5 years
I can’t lie
He caught me off guard
His stature played a part
His approach was rare
His confidence screamed King
As the Queen I am
I welcomed this conversation
Intellectual and fine
No kids or lady
It’s just a matter of time
Will he sink or swim
What will be the cause?
Now fast-forward
Six weeks later
I’m chilling at the house
Knock knock on the door

Mr. Youngster: Surprise!!! Hey Baby I was in the area and decided to stop by
Me: Oh! No call first?
Mr. Youngster: Well babe if I called it wouldn't be a surprise!
Me: True indeed sweetie…so what’s the surprise? Do you have good news? Do you have me a gift? (Smiling)
Mr. Youngster: Nah babe I’m the surprise. I just wanted to see what you were doing. (Laughing)
Me: Oh OK…well babe I appreciate the surprise but going forward please don’t just stop by. I wouldn't do that to you, it’s about respect. Call first! Remember my poem “Call before you come?
Mr. Youngster: How can I forget! (Laughs) Babe but it’s a surprise.
Me: I’m serious babe!
Mr. Youngster: Okay babe. No more surprises for you.
Me: Wow…so how was your day? Are you hungry, I can fix you a plate?
Mr. Youngster: Yes babe I’m starving. So who was that guy that came to your house around 3:15pm?
Me: Excuse you (chuckles with an confused but shocked face)
Mr. Youngster: The dude, don’t act like a dude wasn't here I saw him around 3:15pm
Me: Wait…how did you know who was here and when? Are you stalking me?
Mr. Youngster: Baby no…calm down…I was just in the area.
Me: Oh like for an example, you popping up here tonight? “Just in the area” I mean surprise!
Mr. Youngster: Yes. (Continues eating his food)
Me: Really! Well if you must know that was my brother. His name is David but  we call him D. Please re-frame from calling him dude. (Chuckles)
Mr. Youngster: How do I know if that’s truly your brother I never met him? I know we’re just dating but damn.
Me: Well dear we’re still getting to know each other as friends. It’s only been a month, are you ready to take it to the next level?
Mr. Youngster: I don’t believe you; are there any other David’s I need to know about?
Me: Okay enough is enough, sweetie I’m grown. I don’t tolerate bullshit from no one. Let’s keep it 100! You stalked my house, now stating my brother is not my brother. (Walks to the living room and grabs a family portrait) Look I have three brothers and yes at any moment they will show up to my house as I’m the only sister they have. They check on my from time to time. Now get out!

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