Dating Prison – Mr. Fraudulent #1

Name: Mr. Fraudulent Age: 38

Likes: Younger women

Dislikes: Older women

Victim Eligible: No

Charge: Fraud

Sentence:  3 years

I was at the grocery store

He approached me

He stated: Your height?

I said:  5’3

He stated: Your age?

I said: 30

He stated: Your status?

I said: Single

He asked: Dinner tomorrow night uptown?

I said: Sure…why not.

We exchanged phone numbers

Talked the entire night and morning

I met him at the restaurant

I’m not a fool he could be crazy

He was waiting in the parking deck

It was too cute he saved me a space

As I went to pay for parking

He quickly stopped me and paid

I noticed a little connection as we walked to the restaurant

Our hands just happened to intertwine with each other

As the conversation flowed I was in heaven

Hell I even exhaled J

We started the night off with appetizers & cocktails

Talked about life overall

While the live Jazz band played melodies

We danced the night away

We laughed, told jokes, and eventually played shot games

Dinner is served

We’re responsible adults

Eat and drink water J before operating a vehicle

He stated: Would you like to get coffee after?

I said: Sure I’m having a great time!

The waitress gives the tab to him

He looks at the total with no face expression

Reaches to his back pocket

Then the other pocket

Then his jacket pockets

Then his jeans pockets

Looked up and said I forgot my wallet at HOME!

I’m sorry this never happens to me

I’m embarrassed

If you could pay I would appreciate it

I said: Okay, no problem.

The waitress came over and I paid for my bill.

The waitress came back to the table with my receipt

Told him the remaining balance

He stated: I thought you got me on the bill.

I said: The thing about thoughts

They will get you fucked up in the game

Initially I was going to pay it

But my thoughts begin to process

He stated: What you mean sweetie?

You paid for parking and had your wallet

It’s in your right jean back pocket

You gave your license to the bar tender

Opened a tab AND now you left your wallet at HOME!

Have yourself a good night!

He stated: Wait! My bad…I'm on a budget!

Pays the waitress and leaves!

Copyright 2013