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Friday, May 16, 2014

Dating Prison #8 - Online Dating

Name: Mr. Online Dating  Age: N/A
Likes: N/A
Dislikes: N/A
Victim Eligible: No
Charge: Do not listen to your girls
Sentence:  Use at will
The Blind Date was successful
My girls thought I should take it up a notch
They persuaded me to try online dating
At first I was like HELL NO
I’ve saw plenty of episodes of catfish
I’m not crazy but there are crazy people in the world
However my curiosity said
Hell let see what’s out there
Instantly after setting up my profile
I literally have approximately 50 messages in 5 minutes
For most ladies they would be happy
For me that’s a lot of investigating
There is no point in conversing with someone
If you have nothing in common
Which makes the process of elimination easier?
I’ve set my standards and deal breakers
I’m ready to get started
Within 10 minutes I was down to 18 victims
How is this so?
Please let me explain
The profile picture is what you notice first
If the picture background is dirty, pertains drugs, no shirts or gang signs
He’s disqualified
If the picture contains sexual features, stacks of money, strippers or illegal activity
He’s disqualified
Moving on to the occupation if it states the following, He’s disqualified:
1.       I get Money
2.       I make it rain
3.       Me
4.       Traveler
5.       I take care of people
After deleting those victims I’m left with 18
As new messages begin to pour in
No worries ignore those for a moment
Its best practice to complete the current task first
Moving on to the basic information such as Age, Ethnicity, Education & Appearance
9 victims’ left
Moving on to review intent, first date information, details, interest
5 victims left
Moving on to the deal breakers such as Do you do drug or drink?  Are you single or currently dating?
3 victims left
Do you have a car? Do you have pets? 
2 victims left
Are you sexually active?

0 victim left 

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